wrapped up in a quilt,
special-made by his mother,
i smell him in each stitch.
he managed somehow to pry my fingers from tight
around his heart
to head back home.
he is on a plane towards loneliness,
where a big empty house is all that waits
for the sound of his footstep.
i am left to cuddle on a beat-up couch in a small apartment
smelling my quilt for his scent
and abandonment.
my throat keeps closing up tight.
my eyes keep going wet - dried out - wet.
i want to find peace in this dream i am chasing -
want it to stop feeling like punishment.
i want to find peace in this dream i am weaving with him -
want to be together for good.
just want to feel
whole.
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